Everybody Loves Raymond
in: Characters, Main characters, Barone family, Season 3 characters

Ray Barone

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"Ray" redirects here. For other uses, see Ray (disambiguation).

Raymond Albert "Ray” Barone (born 21st December 1957) is the titular and main character of Everybody Loves Raymond and the show thus focuses with centrality on Ray. He's the husband of Debra, the brother of Robert, the father of Ally, Michael, and Geoffrey, and the obedient son of Frank and Marie. Ray Romano plays the part of Ray.

Raymond lives in Lynbrook, Long Island, New York, with his exasperated wife, Debra, and children, Ally, Michael, and Geoffrey. Ray is a sports columnist for the local newspaper Newsday. Particularly in the first season, he is seen interviewing a famous sportsperson, (although this subsides in subsequent seasons), and he often uses his profession as sportswriter as an excuse to watch sports in the living room or play golf rather than assist Debra with housework. Raymond was pampered and spoiled by his over indulgent, passive-aggressive mother. This makes Raymond a lot like an overgrown child, which makes him a bit of a shiftless husband. He doesn't know how to discipline his kids or how to do anything around the house. He is never seen trying to do anything around the house other than sitting around watching TV or trying to get Debra to have sex with him. He is constantly trying to get his mother to help him avoid all of his adult responsibilities around the house and with the kids. On occasion, Ray shows Debra that he does love her and care for her, which is probably the only reason she hasn't kicked him out or had him slaughtered yet. Although he and Debra cope with the everyday struggles, as mentioned by Raymond in the title sequence of the first season, "it is not really about the kids." Raymond and Debra's major problem comes in the form of the rest of the Barone family, who live across the street: his lousy parents Frank and Marie, and his miserable brother Robert.

As well as acting somewhat infantile, (griping with a nasally, whiny voice), Ray also has a weak, timid, and even neurotic personality, and becomes hesitant to assume any responsibility, and lives in abject fear of his mother, Marie. These traits are explained in stories from parts of Ray's childhood, which revealed that Marie spoiled him and was overbearing and over-nurturing, to the point of obtaining the job of school lunch lady to ensure Raymond ate his greens. She also read his diary (journal) when he was a child and continues to be a nosey busy-body. She constantly tells him to play with his friends while she takes care of the kids and helps him avoid his adult responsibilities. Frank showed no love or affection for either boy. He often belittled them calling them "Nancy-boys" if he didn't think they were acting "manly enough". Ray has ironically replicated with his own reluctance to participate with his own children. His poor attempts at disciplining his children often result in him telling his kids, "If you don't stop, you'll be grounded from TV for a month." and other ridiculous empty threats. This obviously aggravates Debra, as he is not helping her with the kids at all. Ray's success in his work and family life, as well as his status as a "mama's boy," have generated envious feelings with his brother, Robert, who often quotes sayings such as: "It never ends for Raymond," and "Everybody loves Raymond."

He also fears being disliked, as seen in the episode "Somebody Hates Raymond", when he discovers radio station manager Jerry Musso hates him, and becomes subsequently perplexed by it.

Childhood and Background[]

Raymond was born on Long Island in 1959. Many of his emotional problems stem from his childhood. His mother was overprotective, which turned him into a "mama's boy", and he received no affection from his father whatsoever.

When Raymond was a kid, he shoved cocoa-puffs up his nose, and had to be taken to the hospital to have them removed, (by crushing them in his nostrils and blowing out the crumbs). Growing up, he did not have many girlfriends, and was never very successful when it came to women. He met Debra when he delivered a futon to her apartment while he was working for Claude's Futons with his buddy Gianni. At this time, he still lived with his parents. However, he attended St. Johns University in Queens, New York.

In the episode "Boys' Therapy", Raymond discovers that he descended from a long line of physically abusive disciplinarians. But Frank was the exception. He was never physically abusive towards Ray and Robert, never engaging in anything more than yelling at them.

Ray has Italian heritage which is often referenced throughout the show.

Personality[]

Raymond is a lazy, spoiled, immature and selfish individual, who dislikes dong extra work or having any responsibility. He will always try to offhand his responsibilities to his mother, who coddles him even in his 30's. As a result of being spoiled, Ray often acts more like a child than a husband or father, and this forces his wife Debra to baby him and constantly need to push him to help out around the house. Raymond also has an unhealthy view that he is more important in the household, since he actually brings in money, and sees the work his wife does as lesser than. He also assumes his wife does not work as hard as him, and can undervalue her since she doesn't bring in money - despite the fact that she has many chores (including actually handling the finances and where it all goes) and responsibilities in raising the children.

Ray dislikes confrontation, and seldom gets involved when one of this loved ones needs defending, especially not for his wife Debra. Though due to his childhood, he is conditioned to almost always take his mother's side. When a fight presents itself, Ray's first reaction is usually to stay out of it, and simply make jokes on the side. Despite being a fairly docile individual when it comes to disagreements, he has a little bit of his father's temper- and can occasionally explode in a yelling fit. This is rare however, and Ray is usually matching the energy of his more forward wife, parents or brother - as he is a laid back individual at heart.

Ray needs to be pushed to be emotionally responsible, often choosing to ignore his wife's feelings, avoid talking maturely to his brother or parents, and avoid thinking about what to say to his emotionally developing children. Ray's default is being emotionally immature, and he's also obsessed with being liked by everybody. As a result, the moment he thinks someone dislikes him, he can become obsessed with trying to improve their view of him. This is ironic, considering he is constantly doing things to make the people who do love him, struggle with him as a person.

Ray has some redeemable qualities, in that he consistently keeps a job to provide for his wife and children, and can have moments where he steps up and faces problems between him and his parents, wife, children or brother. Though this is usually done after someone has encouraged him to do this. He has love for his family, and can make an effort in being emotionally mature for them - though this is usually only done as a last resort. Ray does truly love his children too, and while he is not as involved as he should be, there have been various times he has made an effort when he realised it was defining moment for his children and how they'll grow up to be.

Character Development[]

The character of Raymond is virtually the same from the first episode to the last. Although in the early seasons, he was portrayed in a much more favorable light. In the later seasons, the show's writers seemed to exaggerate his flaws for the sake of comedy. Raymond still has redeemable qualities, and the show has many moments where Raymond acts a bit more responsibly or makes an effort- though Raymond always resorts back to being a sub-par husband, father, brother and son.

Raymond has done some things to improve as a family member.

>Raymond has bonded with his older brother after trying to see things from his perspective. Such as Robert's Rodeo (Season 4, Episode 15), Raymond made many jokes at Robert's expense, despite the entire family being extremely worried and shocked Robert was injured on the job. By the end of the episode, Raymond realises how badly his brother was injured after agreeing to change his bandages and seeing the injury with his own eyes, and the two bond when Raymond finally takes the situation seriously.

>In No Roll! (Season 6, Episode 2) after realising his wife Debra, has been unsatisfied in bed for 12 years. Raymond makes an effort to prompt her to tell him what she wants, and follow through with this. The two seemingly have a much more fun and adventurous intimate life, as seen in Frank Goes Down Stairs (Season 6, Episode 6), where they are shown having fun and getting injured from an intimate experience.

Raymond has had a few moments where he makes a real effort with his children, when he realises its a defining moment for their development:

>In Mozart (Season 4, Episode 4), Raymond re-learns the piano to show to his daughter Ally, after learning she is considering quitting. He does this as he is adamant he doesn't want her to learn to be a quitter.

>In Bully On The Bus (Season 4, Episode 13) Raymond wants to make an effort to defend his daughter, after learning she is being bullied - and catches the school bus to do this. After it is revealed that his daughter is actually the one bullying others, he opens up to his wife about how he truly dislikes this behaviour - as he was bullied when he was a child. Although lacking the proper words to use, Raymond makes an effort to talk to his daughter and correct her behaviour.

>In Home From School (Season 8, Episode 3), Raymond has a proper chat with his son Michael who is refusing to go to school. After learning his son is avoiding school because he accidentally called the teacher 'mummy' - Raymond opens up about having wet his pants in public as a child, and helps his son understand embarrassing moments are temporary and will pass. This leads his son to wanting to go back to school.

Relationship to other major characters[]

Episode Appearances[]

Ray Barone appeared in all 210 episodes. (See the list of episodes)

Trivia[]

  • Ray has been married to Debra since 1988.
  • Ray's mother loved him more than Robert.
  • In the show, Robert is 4 years older than Raymond, but in real life both Patricia Heaton and Raymond Romano Are 2 years older than Brad Garrett but they are shorter than Brad.
  • He has an undescended testicle, or as Frank calls it his unenjoyable testicle.
  • Ray and Marie are the only main characters to appear in every episode.

Memorable Quotes[]

  • DEBRA: You know what I think?
  • Raymond: If I say "Yes," do you still have to tell me?
  • Raymond: (to Robert) Yeah, you're opening up whole new worlds to them—like the world of feet that smell so bad, your nose had to grow as far away from them as possible.
  • MARIE (Kisses Robert on forehead): I love you.
  • ROBERT: Thanks, Ma. I love you, too.
  • Raymond: Now turn over. She'll powder your ass.
  • DEBRA: You know, it is comforting every once in a while for a wife to hear that... her husband wants to spank a supermodel.
  • Raymond: I don't want to. Sometimes they're naughty!
  • Raymond: I don't know how you live with them. If it was me, I'd be sanding off my fingerprints and rehearsing my 911 call.
  • MARIE: You are some brother!
  • Raymond: Hi, Ma.
  • MARIE: Don't "Ma" me! I finally got it out from Robert. He's been sitting over there for two days, depressed, moping around, not talking to anyone. And you know why?
  • Raymond: Because he's Robert?
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